It's Like Dating...Only Different...

I've been searching for an analogy that accurately describes the dance between job hunter and job recruiter. Given all the different elements at play - power, intrigue, salesmanship, personal connection, and personal fulfillment - well, I couldn't help but think of dating.

Take, for instance, mystery. How much do you reveal on the first date/call? Do you tell your new recruiter up front why you left your last job after six months? Or do you let that hang until he's had the good sense to dig a little deeper? In the dating world, it's the equivalent of "so, what's the longest relationship you've been in?" If the answer is "three months", that's not necessarily something you want to reveal on Date One. (It scares them away, trust me.)

And then there's that awkward "where are we going with this?" moment. In a real relationship, you've got at least a few dates before THAT awkward conversation. Typically (not that I've got much recent experience here) asked after several glasses of wine and a particularly nice night out, when you're wondering if he's going to be around next year...

I had forgotten that, in the job hunt, this conversation - and the "what's your ideal date" conversation - comes at you fast. Like, first phone call fast. Yesterday I was speaking with a recruiter for a staffing firm, who, having seen my "diverse" background in public accounting, wanted to know "what I was looking for". And immediately I felt like I was back on Match.com, searching for Mr. Right.

"In order of priority, I'd like him to be kind, funny, intelligent, financially solvent, and - ideally - taller than me."

Oh, wait...that's the dude part.

"Actually, I'd like a job where I can use the compliance, analytical, project management, and client relationship skills I've built in ten years of consulting."

Which, in dude speak, means "I'll take any guy who is willing to date me."

As you might imagine, this is not exactly a position of power. So, I guess it's back to doing what we always do in these situations: tell the other person what you THINK they want to hear, in order to get close to what YOU want.

Ergo, for the finance guys: "I'd really like an opportunity to work in a strong team of dedicated finance professionals who are interested in making strategic recommendations, and providing good analytics to help the business unit."

Oh, and for dude speak, that would be "I'd like him to be breathing, funny, taller than me, and preferably work in Finance or Law, making more than $75,000/year."

Right. Perhaps both of these are lost causes? I'll let you know how it goes. Here's hoping it's better than the last dude in the inbox on Match.com :)